Latest Stress Management Articles

What You Need To Do To Setup Your Own Meditation Group.

Mon, 24 Aug 2009 02:07:54 -0700

Having your own meditation group is a great way to meet new people but it is also a great way to learn new meditation techniques. As you begin your meditation journey you will find new ways to meditate and everyone will have their own ideas and a meditation group is a great way to learn.

If you are new to meditation then joining a meditation group is a great way to start. Sometimes you will find that there may not be a meditation group nearby so you can certainly start your own. When you do start your own meditation group there is a few things you need to consider.

First of all, you need to work out how many people you want to have in your meditation group. If you are new to meditation then it is recommended that you only have 3 or 4 people in your meditation group including yourself. If you have been meditating for some time then you may consider having anywhere up to 10 people however, when you have that many people in a room make sure that your meditation room is an appropriate size.

I recommend that when you are meditating with 10 people that you do it outside because it is much nicer and if you have 10 people outside rather than inside in a warm climate because you may find it gets very uncomfortable over a 20 to 30 minute mediation session. I certainly recommend that you have air-conditioning for this number of people in a small room.

When you are setting up your meditation group, you will need to develop a way to indicate to people how you will bring them out of their meditated state. In many cases the music you are using if it is designed for meditation will do this for you but there is nothing worse than to be brought out of a nice peaceful tranquil state by the blast of a whistle. One retreat I visited did this and they wondered why people got so agitated.

If you are going to host the meditation group at your home makes sure that you find a suitable room with no distractions and very low noise. If you live in a suburb which is extremely noisy or next to a train station then your guest meditators may find it very difficult to get to the first stage in the meditation process so in this case you may consider hosting your meditation group at a local hall or community centre.

The next aspect you need to consider when setting up your meditation group is whether the group will be run as a guided meditation group or simply a group of people meditating together. I recommend that if you are starting out that you do run a guided meditation group and invite someone from one of your local meditation centers to guide each session. Ask them if they will run the session for free in return for them being able to offer their meditation tools at your meditation group. Some meditation practitioners will charge a fee regardless of you offer, simply because that is how they make a living which is fair enough.

If you are starting out I would encourage you to have the same meditation practitioner run guided meditation sessions for a period of up to six months, simply so that you can learn as much as possible from them and to get your basic meditation techniques down pat. After this period though, I would encourage you to invite other meditation practitioners to teach you their meditation techniques.

Remember, there are many different meditation techniques that will help you to improve your life and the more people you get to meet to share there meditation techniques the more rounded and effective your meditation will become.

When you are setting up your meditation group it is also worthwhile trying to get all your meditation partners to be of a similar skill level especially if you are running a guided meditation session. Also make sure you have your room appropriately setup. For example if your meditation room has candles, incense and meditation music then makes sure you use those during your meditation session.

One issue you do need to consider is whether or not any person attending your meditation group is allergic to incense or essential oils. I am a strong believe in using a lavender based incense or essential oil for introductory meditation sessions. The lavender fragrance is the perfect fragrance for relaxing and has been used for many years by religious meditators because of its soothing nature. Other fragrance you may want to consider is sweet violets or oriental jasmine.

Make sure if you are running your meditation group in your meditation room that you have enough meditation pillows for everyone. There is nothing worse than to go to a meditation session only to find that you are sitting on the hard cold floor. It does make getting to that state of mind very difficult. Alternatively, encourage your meditation members to bring there own meditation pillows. Some meditators are very protective of their meditation pillows so do set some careful rules on meditators acceptable behavior at your meditation group.

Finally, how to find your meditation partners …

The best way to find your meditation partners is to check out meditation websites in your local areas or the yellow pages. You will find there maybe a holistic or healing centre nearby. See if they are holding a group meditation session and go along. While you are there invite some of the attendees to have a private meditation session at your home. One thing I will note is that when you are inviting people into your home who you may not be familiar with always make sure that you secure your valuables and I always recommend having a friend you know really well with you so that if anything happens they can support you.

Setting up your own meditation group is a great way to get to know people and can lead to very long friendships. Remember when meditating in a group you are all taking the meditation voyage together as well as on your own. It is fantastic to share your meditation experiences and techniques that you have learned with each other so you can all try them out and help your meditation skills mature.

7 Things You Should Consider For Your Meditation Room

Fri, 21 Aug 2009 13:11:01 -0700

Meditation is one of the great skills everybody should learn as it helps you in developing a more effective mind and to help keep you at a state of calm. If you are serious about meditation having a room dedicated to the practice does one of two things. The room will after periods of time bring about a sense of calm as soon as you walk into the room because of the association between the room and peace. The meditation room will also encourage you and remind you to stick with the practice. All too often people start out on the meditation journey only to abandon the practice a few months in because they are feeling great.

The downside to this is that if you do not continue practicing your meditation you will never master the art and more so each time you restart the meditation practice it will take you a while to get back into the swing of the art. Meditation is something that needs to be practiced every single day.

When you are setting up a meditation room there are seven things you need to consider to make your room a little special.

Item #1 - Cushions

For most people the optimum place to sit and meditate is on the floor. However since most houses have incredibly hard floors it is always a good idea to have a number of meditation cushions on the floor. Meditation cushions are not anything special they should simply be cushions with enough padding to soften the impact of sitting on the floor for any period of time.

It is always worthwhile having a number of cushions in your room so that if you consider having a group meditation session in your meditation room that you all have at least one cushion each. There is nothing worse than fifteen minutes into a meditation session only to find your bottom has gone to sleep and you feel extremely uncomfortable.

Item #2 - Incense

Incense is a great device to help you relax during a meditation session. You can purchase incense from any quality Asian or Middle Eastern supermarket. Make sure that before you buy a box of any incense that you try out one stick first. Ask the supermarket attendant if you can because in most Asian or Middle Eastern supermarkets they will have samples for you to try.

I have found that lavender is a great incense to use when first starting out, but everybody will have their own preferences.

Item #3 - A Small Prayer Table

I am a great believer in setting your room up similar to those from countries like Japan, Thailand or India. A prayer table allows you to place your incense and other important artefacts for your meditation on the prayer table. Some people use the prayer table to have images of God or Buddha to help in their meditation. If you are not a religious person I simply recommend putting a photo of your family on your prayer table with small incense holders on both the left and right hand side of the prayer table.

The reason I recommend this is that the photos will remind you why you are meditating. Meditation is all about helping you to improve your state of mind.

Item #4 - A CD Player

A CD player is a great tool to have in your meditation room. Using mediation music like Baroque Meditation music will help you be more effective with your meditation. Many people find when they are starting out with meditation that it is hard to get to that state of calm without using meditation music as the music can influence your feelings.

You will find though as you become more experienced in meditation that you will be able to meditate without music but meditation music is essential when you are first starting out.

Item #5 - Seven Candles

Most people in their houses today have harsh lighting in their rooms like incandescent or fluro lights. Often these lights can be very difficult to meditate under even with your eyes closed. My recommendation has always been to meditate under the glow of seven candles. The candles should be located on your prayer table at varying heights.

You will find that the soft glow of an open flame will on its own bring about a sense of calm and make your meditation session a lot more special. I recommend seven candles simply because the number seven is auspicious in my society and religion. Seven being a perfect number helps ensure during my meditation sessions that my session will in fact be perfect.

One safety point I would like to make, please ensure that you put your candles onto trays so that they will not burn your prayer table or start a fire. Candles in a house can be very dangerous so make sure that after your meditation session is over that you blow them out.

Item #6 - Peaceful Pictures and Photos

I have already stated it is important to have on your prayer table a picture of your family to remind you why you are meditating. I also recommend having other peaceful pictures in your room to ensure that when you enter your meditation room that you have a sense of peace and tranquillity.

The types of pictures that are suitable are those of nature or animals like scenes from a rainforest, a flowing brook or even pictures of a calm ocean.

Item #7 - A Vase of Flowers

The last item I recommend that you have in your meditation room is a vase of fresh flowers. There is nothing more relaxing and calming than to smell the perfume of freshly cut flowers. Often you will find that the smell of both the incense and freshly cut flowers will give off a unique fragrance that will help entice your mind into a sense of calm.

If you cannot afford to buy your flowers, why not grow them in your garden. You will be surprised just how easy it is to put some seeds into a pot and grow a bunch of flowers. Note that you do need to water those flowers.

Meditation is an important skill you need to master and having a special meditation room will help remind you and encourage you to practice this art. Just like sport, many people start off with the best of intentions but give up. Having a meditation room will certainly help you stay on track.

To finish off, these are the seven items I suggest that every serious meditator should consider having in their meditation room:

- Item #1 Cushions
- Item #2 Incense
- Item #3 A Small Prayer Table
- Item #4 A CD player
- Item #5 Seven Candles
- Item #6 Peaceful Pictures and Photos
- Item #7 A Vase of Flowers

Relieve Stress Today.

Fri, 21 Aug 2009 05:09:32 -0700

What is stress and how does it come about? What does stress feel like? The denotation of the word would be as follows. A mentally or emotionally upsetting condition occurring in response to adverse external influences and capable of affecting physical health, usually characterized by increased heart rate, a rise in blood pressure, muscular tension, irritability, and depression. There is a lot deeper questions as to stress, such as to the question of emotion, but for now let’s just examine stress.

There are some instances of physical stress created by external situations, although stress in the majority of cases is created by us. We put ourselves in stressful situations. We do not take care in our actions. This leads to problems with a consistent feeling of anxiety. Problems in some cases get resolved but not understood. Many times we are more concerned about avoiding the problem rather than facing it, this of course brings about stress. Problems do not go away. Problems need to be understood. Understood in the sense - all factors at play need to be seen, these factors will tell us what is creating the problem. Problems in actual fact can become opportunities. The whole market place is built on solving problems. So a problem may give you the opportunity to be better. Although this is a kind of positive spin, the fact remains a problem is a problem and within it, there is an answer.

When you find yourself stressed out, step back and take a look at why?

What are some of the factors that cause stress for you? Lack of organization can lead to a lot of stress. Organization puts you in a position of anticipation if you fail to organize you fail to anticipate. Procrastination creates stress, putting things off. Stress can also be caused by poor diet. Not eating right. Drinking a lot of coffee, eating lots of sugary foods. Not sleeping, this becomes the circular challenge caused by worry, or stress
Not been honest brings stress, and when you start adding all this up it equates to been unhappy. Not dealing with issues is the biggest stress builder of all.

Stress is accumulated from the past. You have to deal with it. Sorry there is no easy answer. The past cannot be changed. What you have done is over. Now one needs to examine what caused all this, and this is your problem. Problems are not bad or good. A problem could be defined as, a specific result is desired but impediments exist that prevent it.

Let’s say I do not pay my bills, this leads to a problem of bills adding up and not been paid which then creates the challenge of the power been cut off, then I cannot cook. This is kind of simplistic but one problem leads to another like a domino effect. The problem may have been caused by my lack of budgeting or living beyond my means, and when not confronted leads to stress. Problems are a part of life. However most problems come from ourselves, and are refusal to face the facts is the main issue. The truth will set you free. You cannot change the past. Deal with your circumstances now, as they are, not as you wish they were. Deal with stress today and tomorrow will start to look a whole lot better.

Christmas Stress and New Year Woe - How to cope at this time of the year

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 23:27:11 -0700

Christmas is time to look forward with excitement for the vast majority of the population no matter whether you are religious or not. The New Year is often used to consider what new successes and goals a person wants to aim for. All in all, Christmas and New Year can be a very positive and uplifting time.

Yet, for some people Christmas can bring intense stress and anxiety. The thought of New Year celebrations may fill someone with dread and feelings of depression. Why is this you might ask when Christmas seems to help the general population to be more considerate and compassionate towards each other.

Unfortunately for some people Christmas can be a reminder of everything that they view is wrong with their life. They might reflect on past Christmass as a young boy or girl and reminisce about times of being carefree and without responsibility and feeling excited about their future.

Yet if things havent quite gone to plan in a persons life, Christmas and all its jollity can only make their negative feelings worse. Everyone else seems to have a great life filled with successes and yet they seemed to have missed out.

Events that effect peoples mood at Christmas can typically be: -

1) Divorce and not being to be with the children on Christmas day

2) The death of a loved one

3) The anniversary of the death or a loved one occurring near Christmas

4) Large and unmanaged debts which can be made worse by the expense of Christmas

5) The loss of a employment

6) A lack of friends and family to celebrate Christmas with can bring extra feelings of loneliness and isolation

Now virtually everyone will experience one, if not a number of these life events. Some of these events will be associated with Christmas and the New Year because they happened around this time. However, over time, these associations can be forgotten or turned into positive experiences.

We all cope differently and what for one person is their temporary difficulty, for another will be the last straw. If you feel stressed, anxious, low or depressed around Christmas and the New Year, then you do not have to play victim to these feelings. The bets way of dealing with them is to take action.

Here are some tips for helping you to not only cope better but to tackle that Christmas stress: -

1) Chat to a trusted person about what is bothering or upsetting you. The Samaritans are great for this and will be expecting your call

2) Make a decision to tackle any debts before Christmas arrives so that you can enter the New Year knowing you have taken control

3) If you cant afford to buy presents for those who expect them from you, then tell them. If they are good friends and supportive relatives, they will understand.

4) Commit yourself into Christmas events. Do not turn invitations down. Your life will not change if you stay at home. However you go out and meet new people you give yourself a chance of new opportunities coming your way.

5) Volunteer to work for a charity over Christmas. Even if it is just working in the soup kitchens for one day. You will gain an amazing and life changing perspective.

If you need professional assistance, talk to a therapist who specialises in stress reduction such as a hypnotherapist or EFT practitioner. They can help you make your New Year start with a bang rather than a whimper.

Staying Calm in a Scary Economy

Tue, 03 Feb 2009 01:46:16 -0800

"The sky is falling, the sky is falling!" Perhaps you are familiar with the story of Chicken Little. Do you know anyone like that? Do you know several people like that? Do you find that after you are exposed to these people that you begin to think a bit more gloomy than usual?

It's been said, that "In 10 years our lives will be a reflection of the people we hung around with and the books we read." I know this has certainly been the case for me. I don't spend time with just anyone, and one of my challenges for 2009 (truly) is to figure out where I'm going to house my ever increasing library. I'm running out of room. And anyone who knows me will tell you that I would throw out the couch before I would get rid of any of my books.

There's no denying the fact that economy is in the dumper here in the USA. In all likelihood, it's going to get worse before it gets better…probably much worse. I don't think anyone has made the official "depression" claim yet, but you do remember when the "experts" let us know that we were officially in a "recession", don't you?

I don't know about you, but I have made the decision not to participate in the "recession", or, the "depression" that may be right around the corner. "What do you mean ‘not participate' Vince? That sounds stupid!" you might be thinking.

When the stock market crashed in 1929, and the Great Depression "swooped down", there were people who not only lived comfortably, but prospered during the same period of time that others were standing in soup lines.

Many of the people who prospered during the Great Depression had little to nothing going into it, but because they were able to keep a cool head, not get caught up in the nasty gloom and doom attitude that was so pervasive at that time, and look for the opportunities that surrounded them- and then take action- they became very successful during a period of time when the masses screamed "It can't be done!" In short, they refused to take part in the "Great Depression."

How did they do it? I mean, why on earth did millions of people have to struggle so hard during the Great Depression if it was that easy to have something different than what they had? Most of them simply didn't know they had a choice. I know that sounds very elementary, but it's really just as simple as that. So few people realize they are constantly creating their reality with their thinking and the way they are using their body.

Just last week, I was talking with a friend of mine. He's getting close to 60 years of age. I love the guy, and I've known him for over 25 years now, but it finally dawned on me how his constant and continual thought patterns had created a self fulfilling prophecy.
For several years now, when you asked him "How you doing?" the answer was always "not too bad for an old crippled guy!"

In the last few years he's had two joints replaced and he hasn't recovered too well from the second one. When I first heard him say the "…for a crippled old man" line a few years ago, he was walking just fine. Now, when I watch him walk, he does in fact resemble something much closer to a "crippled old man" than he did before he had the surgeries.

Jim Rohn said it best."First we create our habits, and then our habits create us." This holds true for habits of thought as well. Any thought we hold in mind, with a corresponding emotion of enough intensity, will most likely manifest into our reality.

The mind is much like the soil. The soil doesn't care what seeds you plant. If you plant pumpkin seeds, you'll get pumpkins. Plant beans and you'll get beans. The problem is when we plant onions and expect tomatoes. As you know, a garden just doesn't work that way. The mind doesn't either.

So many people still link "security" with having a job that has "good" benefits.

Here's my definition of security:

Knowing that you'll be able to not only produce, but THRIVE and GROW no matter what is going on in the world around you.

When you know this to be true-at the core of your very being-the conditions of the world around you are more amusing than anything. The things that cause others to tremble, worry, lose sleep and suffer anxiety attacks over, are the very same conditions the truly secure person finds opportunity and excitement in.

Remember when I said that millions of people during the Great Depression didn't know they had a choice? Their lack of choice came in one of two ways. 1. They had no knowledge of the importance of attitude and how it would determine how the events of the Great Depression would impact them, and the actions they would take, or not. 2. They had been exposed to the idea of attitude but wrote it off as "bunk." It really doesn't matter which one. In either case, they were "doomed."

Most people forget how many situations they have encountered, that, at first seemed like impossible obstacles, but were then later overcome through sheer tenacity. Have you forgotten about all of your triumphant victories?

In 1976, at the age of 10, I encountered a sexual predator-not once but twice. In August of 1987, at the age of 21, after skipping out on a fishing trip with my good friend and his brother ( they also happened to be distant cousins) I was notified 24 hours later that they had both drowned.

In December of that same year, December 18th, to be exact, I stood outside of the emergency room and listened to my grandfather struggle to take in his last breathe as he lay dying from a massive stroke. 12 hours later I learned of the death of another friend; 21 year old "Chuck" had frozen to death after collapsing in -17 degree temperatures one evening. They found his rigid body the next morning, three blocks from home. I was a pallbearer for my grandfather on Sunday and "Chuck" the very next day.

In 1995 I was medically dropped from the Navy S.E.A.L. Indoctrination Program after a nasty back injury during training- something that I had been focused on for years- the one thing I had focused on exclusively and based everything else around, was gone, just like that. A year later, I was nearly beaten to death one night in San Diego, CA, and endured several years of neurological challenges as a result.

After an unexpected divorce and a sudden change in my financial situation, I returned to my home state to work as a nurse while I built my business once again- from the ground up. I applied for licensure in Missouri, went to work as a nurse in a correctional facility and waited for my license. This process can take as long as six months, but as long as you are licensed in another state (I was licensed in California and Guam) you can work on a temporary license.

When I hadn't heard back from on my license for several months, I called the State Capital to inquire. "Oh, Mr. Harris, I'm so sorry" the kind lady told me. "Missouri does not grant a license that was issued based on military training." Boom! In the blink of an eye, I was no longer capable of working as a nurse in Missouri, and was literally out of a job that day.

Because I had attended the Naval School of Health Sciences, instead of a civilian nursing school, Missouri would not license me- even though most other states would.

Back to square one. A skill set (nursing) that would no longer be useful to me in Missouri, and most of my finances tied up, located overseas, or just gone!

I could go on and on. People often say "You should write a book!" after hearing a few of my experiences. I say "I have, it's called The Productivity Epiphany!"

I didn't even mention the financial "lows." Let's just say that living in conditions where you have to put cotton in your ears at night to keep the cock roaches out is a sub standard way to live. I had to laugh when I recently heard Sean Hannity proclaim "I know what it's like to be down and out…I know what it's like to just have $200 in your checking account!" Really? Poor guy. Try finding a quarter on the street in Arizona and being excited Sean.

There's more…lots more, but the point is this: Most everyone has experienced some pretty ragged and difficult times in their time here on earth. I shared my experiences so you can look at what you've come through in life already, and see that it's really not all that much different; you're a hell of a lot "tougher" than you think, and have already prevailed many times. Unless you commit suicide and check out early (and I have lost several friends to suicide over the last 27 years) then you are winning. I'm still here baby…and so are you! You have had "bad" times and you will have more of them-this is a given.
When those "bad" times arrive, however, (and they will) what will you do with them?

If there is one thing my experiences have taught me, it's that there is absolutely nothing that can happen that can destroy us and keep us from moving onward and upward-NOTHING!

Take some time this week to make a list of all of the things that have happened over the years that you were convinced, at the time, were going to ruin your life. Look at how much you have accomplished since then, and how much you learned from that experience. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Look, I'm not suggesting that you won't lose your job, watch your stocks or 401(K) all but disappear, or face a serious illness with yourself or a loved one. These things happen. What IAM saying, is that even in the worst of times, you still have the ability, if you choose, to determine what kind of story you will tell yourself about what these events mean to you. This, by the way, is the difference that makes the difference.

For the people that have mastered staying calm and keeping their head when everyone else is going wacky, it's easy for them to just say "Just suck it up and go on!" The reason being, most of them have no idea how they manage to pull it off- it's an unconscious process for them. They may DO it masterfully, but they are very poor teachers. Become one of the few who keep it together- no matter what!

B Vitamin Complex And Stress: How Vitamin B Can Reduce Stress

Mon, 01 Dec 2008 20:41:07 -0800

The connection between B vitamin complex and stress is well known; although why a good B vitamin complex can reduce stress is less well known. Before discussing the reason why a Vitamin B formula can reduce stress, we shall first have a look at stress and what causes it. The term means different things to different people, and a stressful situation to one person might not be such to another.

The biochemistry of stress is fairly complex, although involves the production and release of hormones into your bloodstream. When an event occurs that causes stress, the hypothalamus portion of your brain becomes involved. It releases cotocotropin releasing factor (CRF), a hormone that protects you from stress by raising your spirits. CRF sends signals to the pituitary gland causing the release of ACHT (Adrenocorticotropic hormone corticotropin) that causes cortisol to be released into the bloodstream by the adrenal glands. Cortisol speeds up the metabolism.

Coincidentally, the cells of the brain stem and spinal cord send a message that stimulates the adrenal glands to secrete epinephrine that increases the heart rate, breathing and alertness, ready for fight or flight. Both of these mechanisms then lead back to the pituitary gland and your new stress level can repeat the process or stop it, should your stress be reduced. If this cycle continues over an extended period of time it can have serious repercussions on your mental and physical health.

The B vitamins can help to regulate this biochemical function, and in doing so can reduce stress, and with it the associated anxiety and depression. In fact many of the symptoms of vitamin B deficiency are those that are also associated with stress: anxiety, nervousness, depression irritability and so on. There is no one specific form of Vitamin B that helps with stress, and there are eight in total. However, in saying that, the three members of the B vitamin complex that have most effect on stress are vitamins B 3, 6 and 12.

Every one of the B vitamins is involved in cell metabolism. Because they are soluble in water, they are quickly leached from the body so have to be replaced on a regular basis. The various B vitamins are needed by your body for specific purposes, such as Vitamin B1 (thiamin) is essential for the correct function of your nerves, brain and muscles. Although others have their own particular areas of responsibility, they are generally lumped together, not only because they are all soluble in water, but also because they each have a profound effect on the metabolism of your body.

Those mostly connected with the nervous system are Vitamins B3, B6 and B12. Vitamin B3 (Niacin) helps to maintain the proper health of your digestive system, skin and nerves, and B12 (cobalamin) is also needed for a healthy nervous system. Vitamin B6 (pyridoxine) along with vitamin B12 are the two principal members of the B complex that have an effect on stress, and a deficiency of these can make you more prone to this frequently debilitating condition. In fact many people that are suffering from a general Vitamin B deficiency have various forms of mental problems.

Because Vitamin B12 is available only from animal sources, deficiencies are common in vegetarians, and even more common in vegans who are advised to take a Vitamin B12 supplement. However, in general you are best to take a Vitamin B complex as opposed to a supplement of any specific member of the B family. This is because a surplus of any one could lead to a depletion of others.

It is thought that much of today's stress is caused by an inadequate diet, and a diet deficient in various forms of Vitamin B is believed to render the subject particularly prone to stress and anxiety. People that have been suffering undue levels of stress over a protracted period of time can be helped by a regular treatment of B vitamins. In taking such supplements, however, you should also be aware of the various possible effects on your body that the causes of your stress can have. These are frequently neither understood nor recognized when they occur.

For example, if you are under stress due to a poor diet, or conversely, are eating a poor diet due to your high stress levels, you might be building up fatty deposits in your liver. Because of this your general health could be at serious risk in addition to your mental health. It is important, therefore, that you don't just restrict yourself to a B vitamin complex, but also take a supplement containing inositol and choline bitartrate.

These can reduce the fatty deposit that a poor diet can cause to build up in your liver with consequent risk to life. Such deposits affect the ability of your liver to destroy the environmental toxins to which become exposed as part of your daily life, and which can be directly related to your ability to counter high stress levels.

In general, however, if you are prone to stress and get nervous and worried about the slightest thing that doesn't go to plan, a B vitamin complex can help: vitamin B can reduce stress, although if your stress is sever you would be better advised consulting a physician than a health store.

Stress is a serious condition, and not one that should be treated lightly. It is possible to treat some stress conditions by using a good B vitamin complex, although should the stress be serious then you should consult your physician. Frequently the stress is not diet related, but due to personal circumstances that cannot be cured by any form of supplement.

However, there are few doubts that a course of Vitamin B supplements can help to overcome many of the metabolic causes of stress, and make up for any deficiency in these vitamins that leave your body almost as quickly as they enter it. Vitamin B can reduce stress, but only if your stress is due to a deficiency: and this is more common that most people are aware.

What Stresses You Out? Make a List and Change Your Life

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 00:00:00 -0800

Stress is overwhelming, all absorbing. Part of its terrible power is the feeling you get of losing control, of life washing over you without your input. Before you can address the things that are bothering you, you need to get a handle on them. The most effective tools you have are not drugs, or a therapist, or a padded room in a fancy treatment center -- the most effective tools are a pencil and paper. Clear your schedule, find a quiet space with minimal distractions, and write down everything that's bothering you. Everything. From global warming to the bathroom sink that needs cleaning. Yes, everything. You're going to need several sheets of paper, trust me. When you have finished, take a break; you'll need one. Read through what you have written. You're likely to see some patterns emerging, types of problems that stem from similar sources or that involve similar situations. Now you are going to start making lists that will help you identify and control the sources of stress in your life. List all the people who make you anxious -- include friends, colleagues, family members, and anyone else who makes your life frustrating. In each case, think how you can either improve that relationship or, if necessary, bring it to an end. Obviously, there is a huge difference between switching coffee shops to avoid the snotty barista, and withdrawing from a relationship with a loved one. This is not a time to make hasty and consequential decisions, particularly while stress is making you feel emotionally vulnerable. But a list of this sort may help you identify relationships that would be better abandoned in the long term if your health is suffering. Make another list of sources of stress that don't involve other people, but are instead things in your life you can change on your own. Are you keeping yourself healthy? Perhaps you want to begin exercising regularly, or would like to improve your diet? Is it time to look for a new job, either in your field or perhaps in a different area entirely? Some stress relief may come from simply taking actions that you have been considering for a long time. Your final list will take a different approach. Despite your stress, despite your anxiety, despite feeling overwhelmed right now -- what are the things that make you feel good? What do you enjoy doing, what puts a smile on your face? Make a list of activities that you enjoy; perhaps you like to watch old movies, or to cook for friends, or ride a bike. List all these things, and make plans to do at least one of them this week, and every week from now on. Now that your lists are complete, refer back to them regularly. Every week or so, scan through them and give yourself a check-up -- are you taking action to control the things, situations, and people that stress you out? And are you replacing those negative influences with positive and fun influences instead? You're beginning to change your life for the better, and that's an ongoing process. The lists are your guidebook, but it's up to you to make the journey.

Just Be There For Your Stressed Out Friend

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 00:00:00 -0800

If someone in your family, or a friend, is suffering from stress, your first thought is to help however you can. It's possible to help relieve their stress in immediately difficult circumstances, and also to help them develop defences against stress in the future. Simply by showing that they can rely on your support and presence in emotionally difficult times, you can play a huge role in their recovery. Keep in touch with your friend, and show your support by being a constant and reliable presence. Give them a call to check in and see how they're doing. Maybe they'd like to get together for a drink, a coffee, or simply a walk? Encourage them to talk if they want to, but don't feel that you have to solve their problems; your job is to be a friend, not a social worker or a psychiatrist. It's a job that may well be even more valuable to their progress as they address the issues that have led to stress and anxiety. Particularly if the person you're helping lives on their own, it's important to include them in social and other activities. Call them up and ask them to joinn you for a movie, a pizza, or just a quiet evening at home with a DVD. If you're an exercise fan, that's a great activity to share with a stressed friend, since exercise is an excellent way of relieving stress and tension naturally. But whatever activity you choose, the key is to have your friend join you ... stress coupled with loneliness can quickly lead to depression. One challenge you'll face is knowing how much help to offer. It's a tricky balance of allowing your friend to take control of the situation, versus intervening directly with offers of assistance. Stress and anxiety can cause a person to have feelings of impotence and frustration, and asking for help may seem a sign of weakness. Part of their recovery must involve taking control of their lives again, and that's a task they have to control. By remaining close to them and making yourself available as a resource, you allow them to feel supported emotionally without necessarily feeling smothered. The point at which you must consider intervening more directly is if stress turns into depression, a serious ilness with potentially devastating consequences. If your friend becomes detached from the basic tasks of life, such as food, personal hygiene, work, and friends, they may be headed for depression. Another common symptom of depression is persistent fatigue and an urge to sleep much longer than is normal. If you suspect that your friend is depressed, it's important to look clearly at the situation and ask yourself whether friendship alone is enough. If you're in doubt, if you feel out of your depth, get professional help. In most situations however, stress is a temporary condition that will pass with the help of friends and inner resources. By taking active steps to help your friend, and by remaining accessible and willing to listen, you'll help them move past this troubling time.

Burnout, Self Care and Setting Boundaries

Sun, 26 Oct 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Burnout does not happen over night. It is the result of a constant chipping away of one's energy, love, inspiration, and passion by consistently relinquishing one's power to others and allowing external forces to dictate the course of one's life (Robinson, 2007). Burnout comes from always giving and never getting. It comes from futility, from trying and working hard and never getting anywhere. Any situation where we give and give and receive little, anything that makes heavy demands and gives few rewards can lead to feeling emotionally drained and burnt out (Ultimate Self, 2007). When you spend all your time and energy taking care of others, without nurturing and recharging yourself at the same time, you will eventually experience Burnout (Su, 2007). Idealistic and conscientious people are especially prone to burnout because they give so much of themselves (Ultimate Self, 2007). Burnout could greatly impact a person's physical & emotional health, relationships, work, and everyone related to him/her. When you are burned out, you can't function at your best, and everyone you care about suffer with you. It's not difficult to see that there is much at stake here (Su, 2007). Pinpointing Burnout Are any of the following patterns present in your life (Robinson, 2007; Eliott, Glouberman, & Mills, 2008)? Do you repeatedly say "yes" to things when you would really like to say "no"? Do you consistently work overtime when you really don't want to but feel guilty about not picking up that extra shift? Do you find yourself staying late at work because you employer needs you, even though you are exhausted? Do you take on assignments that have you sprinting throughout your day without a break and feel unable to "catch up" with the day when your workday is over? Do you consistently put the needs and wants of others before your own? Do you keep on going and ignoring the concerns of loved ones or colleagues? Speeding up in an attempt to cope? Slowing down in confusion as focus is lost? Increasingly ineffective at performing familiar tasks? Working harder and harder and achieving less and less? Escapism in the form of addictive behaviour eg increased intake of alcohol, food, drugs, or over-indulgence in sex, shopping, TV watching, internet browsing? Whatever the reason, the challenge of burnout is to recognise it is not a random event. It has something important to tell you. Burnout needs to be listened to and honoured. It could save your life (Eliott, Glouberman, & Mills, 2008). What Can You Do to Prevent Yourself From Becoming a Victim of Burnout? Burnout can be turned around. It may take weeks or months, and for the unlucky few, years. But the sooner you decide to listen to the message of burnout, opt to go with it, learn from it and not fight it, the sooner you will be back on track. It will most likely be a different track and an infinitely more fulfilling one. To recover from burnout you will need courage, motivation and a desire to change. Without this your situation is likely to remain the same (Eliott, Glouberman, & Mills, 2008). An important place to start is to decide to treat yourself well! Treating yourself well starts with learning to respect yourself. You may find you run up against some old patterns and beliefs that no longer serve you. One belief many people have which does not serve them is the belief that they must put caring for others in front of caring for themselves. However, if you do not make yourself a priority and care for yourself first, how can you expect to take great care of others (Robinson, 2007)? Boundaries and Self Respect Personal boundaries are limits or borders that define where you end and others begin. Your personal boundary is defined by the amount of physical and emotional space you allow between yourself and others. Personal boundaries also help you decide what types of communication, behavior and interaction you accept from others. The type of boundaries you set defines whether you have healthy or unhealthy relationships (Ricardo, 2007; Gahrman, 2003). Setting strong boundaries will help you stand up for yourself, stop agreeing to do things you really don't want to do, and start feeling less guilty about putting your own needs first. It is a part of the process of defining yourself and what is acceptable to you. When you don't have boundaries set other people will step over the line without even realizing where it is. It's important to note that in establishing boundaries your personal needs are valid. It is not necessary for you to defend, debate or over-explain your requests. (Gahrmann, 2003). A lack of boundaries is like leaving the door to your home wide open, anyone, including welcome and un-welcome guests can walk in without hesitation (Ricardo, 2007). Solutions and strategies to help you (Eliott, Glouberman, & Mills, 2008; Whaley, 2004; Su, 2007; Ultimate Self, 2007): Understand stress habits and how to change them; recognise the source of stress. Set realistic goals for yourself that are not in conflict with your personal values. Goals can keep us moving forward in the right direction, yet they shouldn't clash with one's individual standards and priorities. For example, set as a goal not to accept a job that requires a lot of travel, if your personal values require you to be home in the evening with your children. Manage your energy. Make time for yourself. Schedule your calendar to make sure you have sufficient hours for your own relaxation. Remember, you are the most important person in your own life. Whether it is a hobby, exercise, meditation or just getting your nails done, take time to enjoy your own company. Practicing intensive self-care is not being selfish, it's an act of self respect. After all, if you can't honor and respect yourself, how can you expect others to do so? It may be necessary to change jobs or cut back hours worked. Ask for help or delegate to reduce your workload to manageable proportions. Bring clarity where there is confusion. Take charge of, and responsibility for, your own career and your own life. Be proactive, not reactive, on a personal level. Don't let outside actions and events alone dictate your decisions. Measure your progress toward the realistic goals that you have set. When reverses and disappointments occur, adjust your goals accordingly but keep moving toward them. Discover new perspectives. Can you be flexible about HOW you want things done? If you can be flexible, then there's greater chance you can delegate some tasks to someone else and respect other people's initiatives at the same time - , and free up your precious time & energy for the tasks that really must be done by you, and/or things that you actually enjoy doing. Lift your spirits, feel confident and resourceful again. Celebrate successes and learn from failures. Even small milestones should be celebrated. Take time out, a holiday, a break away, a rejuvenating physical and mental rest. Do things to recharge your batteries, pamper yourself and give yourself the things that others won't. Look after yourself (because no one else will). Make sure you get enough sleep, eat well, exercise, have a healthy social life and have time for yourself. Expand your horizons. Find things that give you positive rewards and feedback (new people, activities, study, hobbies, whatever gives pleasure and builds confidence). Find the right balance. Take an honest look at your to-do list -- how many of those tasks are **truly** necessary for YOU to do? Can someone else do some of those jobs for you? What are the tasks that you must do yourself? What are the ones you are good at, or actually enjoy doing? Try to focus most of your energy doing those things, and barter or hire someone else to help you with other tasks. You will be more productive and happier. One word about housework -- get your husband and kids to do their share. They are not "helping you out", they are "sharing responsibilities" that belong to them. Can you give up perfectionism? Why are you putting yourself in a position of extreme pressure to do everything perfect? When you hold up unrealistic standards like that, it only creates stress, tension, resentment, and/or even self-hatred. Be true to yourself Enjoy life better than ever before. Have fun. Tomorrow is not promised to you. Do not let work consume your existence. Whatever you want to do in life, do it now. When you feel overwhelmed and your life is spinning out of control, instead of trying to work faster and harder, you should try to deliberately s-l-o-w d-o-w-n. Ideally, you want to create some "white space" in your life, i.e. pockets of quiet time to meditate, reflect, stop and smell the roses. You want to live in the present moment, and truly be where you are at every moment. When you are coming home from work, create some kind of ritual to signal the end of your work day, and prepare yourself for the transition back to home life. Put a wooden sign on your front door that reads, "Upon entering the door, please take off your troubles. When you come home, bring happiness with you". That's a great reminder for you and your family to leave work at work, and don't let the stress from work "bleed" into our family life. References Burnout. (2007). Retrieved October 17, 2008, from the Ultimate Self (realizing personal potential) web site Eliott, H., Glouberman, D., & Mills, J. (2008). Signs and symptoms of burnout. Retrieved October 17, 2008, from the Burnout Solutions web site Gahrmann, N. A. (2003). Establish boundaries that honour you. Retrieved October 17, 2008, from the MomMD. Connecting Women in Medicine web site Ricardo, L. (2007). Boundaries. The importance of choosing to value ourselves. Retrieved October 17, 2008, from the The Online Self Improvement Encyclopedia website Robinson, K. (2007). Burnout. Retrieved October 17, 2008, from the Coach You Through Burnout web site Su, H. (2007). Life balance lessons: 7 keys to avoid burnout. Retrieved October 17, 2008, from the Intensive Care for the Nurturer's Soul web site Whaley, L. (2004). Avoiding the burnout trap. Retrieved October 17, 2008, from the Motivations and Strategies for Entrepreneurs web site

Discussing Stress And The Different Methods To Treat It

Fri, 17 Oct 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Stress is one of the most common forms of anxiety. Stress and other related problems are present in nearly every person alive in varying degrees. There are actually several different kinds of it, some of which are more dangerous than others. It is important to keep it under control with proper stress management so that it does not take over an otherwise healthy life. Stress and related disorders come in many different forms. These disorders can range from minor irritants to full blown serious health issues. It can cause ulcers, eating disorders and sleep disorders. Someone under it cannot enjoy themselves because they are constantly thinking about the pressure that they are under. This means that the brain never has time to relax and release the troubles of the day, which can cause mental issues, as well as affecting the sufferer's family and friends. Yet a stressful lifestyle is something that most people face today. Worries about family, jobs, money, and other things are all causes of it in today's busy, modern world. Untreated, it can cause serious health issues, so the best thing to do when dealing with it is to try to take things as they come and not worry about them so much. Stress can be treated in different ways. While the initial treatment is to learn stress management skills, in many cases it is not enough to see a noticeable change in its levels. Many health experts believe that high levels can lead to other issues, such as depression and anxiety disorders. Antidepressants are sometimes prescribed for stress and its related cousins. If you suspect that someone you know is suffering from too much stress, or you feel that you are under too much of it, then it might be a good idea to read health guides to properly diagnose what you or your loved ones might be going through. The best way to live a stress free life is to learn to let things go. Of course, this can often be extremely hard to do, which is why stress management is a very popular form of therapy. If such a problem is suspected, then be sure to contact a health professional for an expert diagnosis. Stress and its related disorders can lead to serious health risks, so it is very important not to ignore the signs. One of the most common treatments is stress management courses, or antidepressants. Since this is a problem that strikes everyone at some point or other, it is important not to overlook the importance of treatments if levels become too high. A health expert can coach someone on the best way to deal with it.