Latest Advice Articles

Grab the Opportunities, It Never Comes Again

Tue, 01 Sep 2009 00:50:28 -0700

Grabbing the opportunity is a big challenge in our life. If we are success to grab the right opportunity at the right time, we will get great success in our life. In this article we have discussed that how to grab opportunity? And how to react or respond opportunity?

How to grab the opportunities? It depends how we react or respond to the opportunities that life presents us is an important key to accomplishing in life.

When presented with an opportunity one person may utilize or grab it while another may pay no attention to it or feel indifferent to it. Those who grab it are put on the fast track to success while those who ignore it stay where they are on regress. Most individuals do not pay attention or they do not realize the importance of opportunities. They respond to opportunity in a lethargic manner over a prolonged of time.

If we pay more attention in our lives, if we are open and our attitudes, opinions, and practice don’t get in the way, we will be keen to grab new opportunities when they come our way; opportunities that can create the difference between ordinary success and great success in life.

As we have discussed because we are not paying enough attention to recognize and respond positively to opportunities that come our way, often people take action to opportunities in a lethargic manner. That prolonged and troubled, occurs in lots of person’s lives, and tends to show it in consistent patterns. Let’s then look at this pattern in terms of two persons, one Britney, the superstar of pride and prejudice, and a struggler in the present times.

Both are presented with an opportunity and both responds in a similar way, indicating distinct patterns of response to the opportunity, matched by a tricky personal growth. The general phases in the process we have again and again witnessed when a great opportunity comes our way are in chronological order of occurrence:

* Complete lack of consciousness of the great opportunity.
* Unresponsiveness when one finally does become conscious of the opportunity.
* Hostility to the great opportunity.
* Recognition of the possible benefit and importance of the opportunity.
* A real positive response and reaction to the opportunity.
* An impatience to grab the opportunity; even an extreme anxiety to gain it.
* Experiencing emotionally and physically the full delight that the opportunity present.
* A recognition of one’s mistakes and limitations that prevented one from ceasing the opportunity in the first place, or being antagonistic to it.
* Fully grabbing the opportunity, though success at this point may be too later or diluted, or lucky or deep enough change in one’s attitudes and mind, full achievement.

Copyright © Nick Mutt, All Rights Reserved. If you want to use this article on your website or in your ezine, make all the urls (links) active.

Know People's Behavior Through Face Reading

Wed, 26 Aug 2009 00:17:41 -0700

Want to learn how to read faces? The ability to interpret a person’s face during conversation or on certain circumstances can lead you to better insights on a person’s inner thoughts, feelings, or attitude. Isn’t that fascinating?

Hence, you must take the time to know how to read faces when conversing with people. However, you must refrain from staring too long because this might cause discomfort on the other person’s part.

Facial features reveal the differences in personality, character, strengths or weaknesses of a person. Oftentimes, your current state of mind or feelings is greatly reflected on your face. Permanent lines and features are etched deeply on your face depending on the degree of your emotion. This makes it possible to interpret your feelings and thoughts at a particular moment.

Face readings and interpretations can be subjective; but still, these are supported by scientific studies. Facial features provide you with a better understanding of a person’s mind roadmap.

For example, the forehead reveals a person’s thinking style. Hence, you might notice that some people have more lines on their foreheads. These lines can be crooked or straight. To some extent, these show how a person thinks. Others argue that deep facial lines are results of inherited genes.

You can also learn how to read faces through the eyes and lips, as they are also expressive features in a person’s face. If you can see white between the lower eyelids and the iris, then it signals that the person is worried. And if the white can be seen above of the iris, then it is likely that the person will respond fiercely about the situation. Lastly, lines on the sides of the eyes show someone who often smiles or a generally happy person.

The lips, on the other hand, are a great way to read faces. Fuller or wider lips indicate a person with a relaxed approach in life or someone who likes to talk. Meanwhile, those with thin lips are ones capable of keeping their concentration.

Every feature in your face holds a significant meaning. Therefore, you must take note of the differences on each side of the face. It has been scientifically proven that each side to your face is controlled by either parts of your brain.

The right side of your brain controls the left side of your body, while the left side of your brain controls the right side of your body

The left side of the brain is responsible for logic. Hence, it works like a computer. This logical side is reflective of your professional and external life. The right side of the brain is associated with imagination, intuition, and emotions. Consequently, the left side of the face represents your personal side. Isn’t learning how to read faces fun to do?

Create an imaginary line that divides both sides of the face and notice any symmetry. If they are asymmetrical, it reveals that the person have varying perspective in terms of personal and professional life. It is revealed in the difference of details when it comes to the face's lines, eyebrows, cheeks, nostrils, and forehead, among others.

So when you are interacting with a person, notice the differences in the facial features of each side of their face. A slight change holds significant meaning, whether it is related to a person’s professional or personal life.

There are several ways to read and interpret facial expressions or features. However, learning how to read faces remain tricky despite several scientific studies that support it.

Can Steve Really Quit Smoking?

Tue, 25 Aug 2009 10:20:49 -0700

Say hello to "Steve."

Steve is a fictional character who has been smoking for more than 5 years...Steve would love to quit smoking, but he just never seems to get around to it...

A few months ago, Steve was talking a big game about how he wanted to finally quit smoking cigarettes. About how quitting smoking would be better for his health in the long run. About how much money he'd save if he were to finally give up the habit. And Steve WAS successful at quitting smoking. At least for a little while...HORRAY!

But now, the weekend is here & Steve's ready to party.

Steve had a rough week at the office & he needs to take the edge off. Steve buys a 6 pack of his favorite beer at the local grocery store & he heads over to his friend Brian's house (Brian is also a fictional character)...

The music is playing, the beer is flowing & then Brian offers him a smoke. Steve just can't resist...

After all, the smell of the cigarettes can be so tempting to people trying to quit....& Steve he has so many fond memories that are deeply associated with smoking. In Steve's mind, smoking reminds him of all those good times...

Steve just feels he HAS to have a cigarette- all those good times are reloaded in Steve's brain. "Sure, man...why not?"

And now, Steve's smoking again...However, now he's now got all sorts of mixed feelings and emotions...

1. First of all, his body might be used to the familiar chemical effects that cigarettes are now being rekindled deep in his bloodstream. Steve's body isn't sure whether he likes this feeling or not.

2. Second, Steve might be experiencing some conflicting emotions internally. While the cigarettes have brought bring back the old feelings of celebration & the "You only live once" attitude, he's also keenly aware that he was trying to quit smoking & now he's seemingly not going to follow through with his decision...he feels like he's broken a promise that he made to himself!...but, at the end of the day, his decision to quit was for his own good, right?

3. And finally, Steve starts extrapolating his experience today to other areas of his life...He's thinking, "If I can't make a decision & stick to it. What else won't I be able to complete? Is this the type of person I am? No, wait. I've completed other things in the past...it's just a cigarette...whew.." Steve thinks to himself. But really, what's he thinking is: "this is just silly."

Wow! Who'd ever think that so many emotions could be wrapped up in one little tiny pack of flimsy cigarettes?!

Ask any current or ex-smoker you know whether they've experienced anything like this in the past...However, you better take a seat. They may tell you all about these feelings & many more.

If you smoke (or recently quit), can you relate to this story or a similar one? Does Steve's story sound a little like deja vu all over again...?

For all the smokers reading this, Steve's story may sound all TOO familiar....However, there is good news...

The fact of the matter is that there are aids to stop smoking that are being sold in the market place. And people have invested money in stopping smoking products...And some of these products come with a 100% money back guarantee.

So, which stop smoking aid should Steve invest in?

The answer may surprise you! Click one of the links below to find out the answer right now:

Are You Becoming the Best You?

Sun, 23 Aug 2009 21:31:43 -0700

As I ponder this question… I was wondering if YOU are willing to take this journey with me & think about this question, deep within… No matter where you are in your life, take a moment to ask yourself these questions: Who am I? Am I on purpose? Am I being fulfilled? Am I becoming the best me?

I've been a student of personal development consistently for over a year now. It's been an honor & privilege to work with Dr. Ellie Drake, an Inspirational & Transformational Global Speaker/Coach. As I reflect back on my journey of empowerment and personal development, I've grown tremendously and continue to allow myself to expand my wings, to become the best me! I am allowing myself to transform into the person I was meant to be ~ it's my birth right! During this journey, it's been an ongoing process and I'm finding out more about myself on a deeper level, while exploring ~ Who I am… Identifying & embracing my purpose… Getting clarity on how can I serve… And, understanding how I can be the best me…

While exploring these questions in-depth, I've been learning and practicing a few “key ingredients” that I'd like to share with you, in hopes that it will inspire & assist YOU on your journey…

Acceptance ~ No matter where you are in your life today, take responsibility and allow yourself to accept where you are, while being grateful! Knowing where you are and accepting it allows you to begin your journey of becoming Who You Are! Also, give yourself permission to move forward.

Awareness ~ I'm learning and practicing how to be more aware of my thoughts, which are inter-connected with my feelings. Awareness is profound! Being consciously aware of your thoughts, allows you to explore deep within you. Become the observer of your thoughts and you will begin to understand Who You Are Being!

Thoughts ~ Being consciously aware has allowed me to practice how to re-record my “old” negative thought patterns and replace them with “new” positive thought patterns. By making this minor, yet powerful shift, you are re-defining yourself and Becoming a Better You!

Feelings ~ Since our thoughts and feelings are inter-connected, I'm learning how to change my feelings in an instant, by choosing to change my thoughts! Think about this… you can't be happy & sad at the same time, right? However, you get to “choose” in an instant if you want to be happy or sad, it's up to you. Choose to empower yourself to Become the Best You!

Trust ~ Along my journey of personal development, I'm learning how to “trust the process,” while trusting myself. I'm trusting that everything will unfold in its own time! Trusting your intuition & having that gut feeling, allows you to be… Who You Are Meant to Be!

Beliefs ~ I'm practicing how to change my “old” disempowering beliefs with “new” empowering beliefs, which enhances me! Your beliefs are the core to your heart & soul… The core of being Who You truly Are!

Values ~ I'm learning how important it is to reflect on my values! It keeps me focused on what's important in my life… What you truly value reveals Who You Are!

Being more consciously aware, while implementing these small, yet powerful “key ingredients” in my life, allows me to transform into the person I was meant to be… And, ultimately becoming the Best Me!

So, I ask YOU… Are You Becoming the Best You? Allow yourself to Expand, Grow & Transform… to be the Best YOU!

Creating A Limitless Life...

Sat, 22 Aug 2009 02:00:49 -0700

What is a limitless life? It's a life where you are free to reach your highest potential - a life where negative thinking is powerless to stop you from pursuing your dreams and desires to create a rich and abundant life full of joy and possibilities. It's a life where you are completely open to seeing those possibilities.

I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I lived just the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well. Diane Ackerman

Do you want to only live the length of your life, just plodding along and taking what comes your way? Or do you want to live the width of your life as well, experiencing the fullness of opportunity that life has to offer and always being open to more - more joy and happiness, more peace, more abundance, more love, and more success in whatever way you define it?

1. Take responsibility for your life. This is the only way to go beyond just taking what life brings. You have to claim your life in order to create your own destiny. It's under your control. Believe it or not, you are the one who decides how to spend each day that you have here on Earth, and you can choose to spend them either in joy or dissatisfaction.

2. Decide what you want. So many people waste life's precious moments complaining and reciting all the things they don't want. Free yourself from that trap. Look deep inside yourself and determine what a limitless life means to you.

3. Take action and live now. Stop waiting for tomorrow. Make even a small amount of time each day to either do or pursue the things you dream of. Don't wait to take action when you could do it now, and don't assume life will reward you with all you dream of if you're unwilling to get off your butt to go after it.

4. Learn to quiet and question your mind. Ceaseless and unquestioned thinking is one of the greatest obstacles you will ever face in pursuing a limitless life of happiness, abundance and peace. Your mind and thoughts are tools for you to use to support yourself in your unlimited life. (Think you don't have time to learn to quiet your mind? Check out my article Meditation in a Busy Life.)

5. Think big and push yourself beyond your comfort zone. This is one of the best ways to keep yourself growing. In life, if you're not growing then you're either stagnating or dying. Stretch and reach for a little more than you are comfortable with, a little more than you think is possible and you will often be rewarded beyond what you expected.

6. Continually work at releasing your negative thoughts and feelings. Negativity inside of you in any form is resistance, and resistance sets up limits. When you can free yourself of negativity, you open yourself to new possibilities that were previously clouded by your negative perspective. (For tips, see my long article Overcoming Negative Energy at my website.)

7. Surround yourself with other positive-minded people. Cultivate friendships and relationships with people who are joyous in life and have a positive energy within them. Seek out other unlimited thinkers - they do exist! (And my personal suggestion is to run the other way when you're confronted by negative complainers - they'll suck the life right out of you...)

8. Take time to consider why you or your soul are here. Are you here to live a life of misery and complaint, or unlimited abundance in every area possible? Realize that there are some people living under the most difficult conditions life can offer who still manage to create love, joy and peace for themselves.

9. Search for and live your passion. When you find what you truly care about and put your energy into it, you create a a powerful force for breaking through your preconceived limits.

10. Be open to giving AND receiving. Give of yourself in everything you do. Put your values into your life, give your love as freely as possible, support others as they try to create happiness for themselves. And then make sure you are open to receiving all the good that's coming to you. If you are not open to receiving the best that an unlimited life has to offer, then you will not see the opportunities and gifts before you and they will pass you by.

Life is like a gift in a box, and you have to decide whether to throw it away, leave it sitting unwrapped in the box, or gleefully tear open the box to find the delightful possibilities inside. It's up to you. Nobody else gets your gift. Nobody else can open it for you.

Are you ready to embrace your gift with gratitude and be open to the unlimited possibilities that await you? Are you ready to live the width of your life fully? Then start today. Don't wait. Enjoy!

Creating Wealth Through Personal Development...

Fri, 21 Aug 2009 23:55:16 -0700

Many people are searching for ways to improve their life, and most of the time personal development is the first stepping-stone. What is personal development? In short, it’s learning to listen to your heart, and realizing that how you react to the world is much more important than what actually happens to you. It’s letting go of limiting beliefs and realizing that you can truly accomplish anything once you set your mind to it. It’s changing your “within” so you can function optimally and prosper better in the world around you.

Recently, many people have begun to realize that they can create wealth by using the principals of personal development in their business opportunities. By opening themselves up to the possibility of creating wealth and opportunity, they attract those circumstances into their life naturally and begin enjoying tremendous success on a financial as well as personal level.

Think about it this way. Years ago, the idea of “starting a business” was not one that was widely accepted. It was “risky” and, while not frowned upon, it definitely wasn’t something the average person considered a viable option. The attitude for most people was that success meant a comfortable job that offered long-term security. You worked hard all your life for someone else, provided for your family, and then retired.

Although there is nothing wrong with this mode of thinking, to say that most people have this view now would be wrong. More and more people today understand that owning their own business and using their creativity to create wealth enables them to live a life they’ve always dreamed about. They don’t want to be “stuck” in one job any longer. They want opportunity to learn and to grow, challenge, and freedom. They want a life that lifts them up instead of making them feel chained and monotonous.

More people than ever are discovering their entrepreneurial spirit, and it’s a number that is constantly growing. Are they using personal development in their businesses to create wealth? Well, of course not all of them are, but you’d be surprised at how many are. The days of personal development being New Age are long gone. People are awakening to the fact that what you focus on is what you create and what you see.

Here’s a good example. Many people think constantly about what they don’t have. They don’t have enough money, they don’t have a nice enough car, and they don’t have a nice enough house. If that’s where you put your attention, then of course that’s all you’re going to see. You won’t really move further past that.

Think about what might happen if you turned inward and started being truly grateful for what you do have, and what you are going to accomplish. Instead of putting your attention on not having enough money, you put your attention on the opportunities to create more wealth in your life. You focus on something that you can do, a positive, instead of not having, which is negative.

And think of the positive energy that transpires if you use your motivation and inspiration to help others realize their dreams. It’s a forward motion that, like a snowball, gets bigger and bigger and bigger the more time passes. The more you focus on the possibilities that exist and on helping others you increase the wealth and abundance that comes into your own life. It’s a magic recipe for success in and of itself.

Take a look at people who are truly happy and successful. Sure, there are plenty of people that are wealthy, but they’re miserable, and conversely, there are plenty of happy people that are broke. If you want to create wealth in all areas and have a joyful life at the same time, then you must turn inward first and then use the principals of personal development in your own life and business. You help yourself, and once you’ve done that you can help lift up others in the same way. It’s a cycle of giving that not only pays off in your business, but you get even more back spiritually knowing that you’re affecting positive change in the world

Life Advice

Fri, 21 Aug 2009 05:16:29 -0700

Below is a compiled “list for life”. Some of these “bits” of inspiration and thought have been seen in other places and have been written anonymously. It is NOT my intention to state them here as if they are my own. Most likely you have read many of them before however now they have been collected and grouped together. I pray this is beneficial for you. Enjoy and may God Bless you as you seek to change and better your life.

• Get up on time and at the same time daily so you can start the day unrushed.

• Say No to projects that won't fit into your schedule or that may compromise your mental health.

• Delegate tasks to capable others. It’s okay to admit that we need assistance.

• Simplify and create an uncluttered life both emotionally and physically.

• Less is sometimes more. Although one is often not enough, two can often be too many.

• Allow extra time to do things and to get to places. This promotes serenity and peace in your life.

• Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don't lump the hard things all together.

• Take one day at a time, one moment at a time. It’s all we have.

• Never borrow troubles from the future. If we worry about what might happen tomorrow and it never happens we have worried for no reason and if it does happen well, now we have worried twice.

• Pray this simple prayer when you fell anxious or overwhelmed: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can and the Wisdom to know the difference.

• Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases. This holds especially true in our current economy.

• It’s fun and very helpful to have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc.

• K.M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This one piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble.

• Do something special for yourself at least one a week.

• Pray- Pray- Pray

• Carry a Bible (it’s my favorite book) with you to read while waiting in line.

• Get plenty rest and remember to eat right.

• Stay or get organized, everything has a place. This provides ease of living day to day.

• Listen to a CD while driving that will help you improve yourself or your life.

• Write down thoughts and inspirations. Keep a notebook at all times.

• Every day, find some time to be alone with God.

• Need a friend or a listening ear? Talk to God, He has the best advice around.

• Make friends with Godly people and fellowship with one another.

• Laugh and then laugh some more!

• Talk less; listen more. The best way to make friends is to be a friend.

• Slow down and smell the roses, life is too short.

• Every night before bed, think of one thing you're grateful for that you've never thanked God for before

• REMEMBER - GOD HAS A WAY OF TURNING THINGS AROUND FOR YOU.

Good IQ Score: The Myth & The Truth

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 22:14:11 -0700

There might be some people who claim to have a very good IQ because they have scored good in some tests. Some go to the extent of displaying their IQ score wherein sometimes the score is said to be as high as 120! The intelligence is directly proportional to the score – so is the prevalent belief. But such a claim and belief is false and biased. Each IQ test is unique, hence a high score in one test may cannot be compared to an average score of another test.

A good IQ score is highly subjective. Raw score is what you obtain when counting the answers that are correct. They should be evaluated and interpreted using some rules, otherwise it would be useless. Psychometric principles may be used to compare two scores, but some issues discussed below cannot be ignored before coming to a conclusion about the IQ score.

The Title of the IQ Test

It is rather unfortunate that psychologists haven’t till now frozen on a system to compare two IQ scores from two varying tests. Comparing two scores just on the basis of their magnitude may not be a very good idea. To determine if a score is good you have to know what the test is about and what was the highest score that one secured.

How tough is the test

The second parameter to be focused on is how tough the IQ test it. It will be easy to know if the score is really good, if we know how tough is the test. Usually the tougher the test is the lower one scores. It is highly probable that the IQ scores of two tests with the same name differ. This is because the level of difficulty of both the tests is not the same. Those who design the test decide upon the level of difficulty depending upon the age group, education and other parameters.

The Matter matters

There can be a lot of tests which have the same title or name but have different matter or subject they focus on. A 120 IQ score on one test, say verbal capability doesn’t mean you have the same level on a test with the same name but focus on mathematical abilities. Usually IQ tests try to include subject from all other categories, but today IQ tests are becoming more and more focused. Hence the subject of focus of the test should also be given its due consideration.

Age: another parameter to be addressed

When you are young, you tend to be a high IQ scorer. As you grow up the intelligence start deteriorating. But the actual intelligence that you possess may be different. The label of test, the level of difficulty or the focus area of the test is crucial. The highest score that you have got in any IQ test may not be the correct indicator of your intelligence.

Standard Deviation Units may differ

Mental age was believed to be good enough to evaluate your intelligence. But soon it was found to be of no use and a concept of intelligence quotient (IQ) was born. It is ratio of mental age to chronological age interpreted in percentage. 100 is believed to be an average score and any difference is believed to be above of below average. This system was good until it was proved worthless, because the standard deviation is not the same throughout your life.

All IQ tests don’t use same standard deviation. One may use a standard deviation of 15 and another 20. it is obvious then that two different scores cannot be compared at the same level. Hence interpreting a good IQ score becomes all the more complex.

The foundation has vanished

You can find all the above discussed parameters - the level of difficulty, the matter, standard deviation explained in detail in the IQ tests. But you will never be able to find the system from which the test was designed.

The system is a perfect sample taken from the population. But the population cannot be perfect since the pubic varies a lot. The situation even more convoluted when you compare different societies. Hence no IQ score can be perfect or be considered the best, even though the variables remain stable.

IQ Score: does it exist?

No digit cannot be established as a good IQ score. Any such claim is false and biased. So there neither exists a good IQ score or a bad one for that matter. But the industry is not at all concerned to remove this misconception. No efforts are being taken to clarify this issue by anyone.

Increasing Your Energy...

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 07:17:55 -0700

Do you have enough energy to create the life you want? Energy is the critical, invisible force that creates your vitality and aliveness.

Without it, you drag through life, tired, stressed, and drained. With it, you feel good, enjoy yourself, and have the fuel to create what you want in life.

When it comes to energy, more is definitely better and you can create more energy with a few simple steps.

Your Energy Account

Think of your energy like a bank account. Your thoughts, activities, actions, and interactions all have the potential to increase or decrease the balance in your account.

Withdrawing energy lowers the balance; depositing energy raises the balance. To keep your energy account high (which is what you want) minimize your withdrawals and maximize your deposits.

It sounds so simple but how can you actually do this?

How Do You Keep the Balance High?

Here are two keys to increasing the balance in your energy account.

1) Drop the drains.

We use energy all day long. That's what energy is for. However, some things drain too much of our life energy.

You might be drained by your job, certain family members, technology, time pressures, negative self-talk, negativity in others, or world problems.

What drains you is unique to you. A job, a person, or a task you find draining might not be draining for someone else.

Do less of what drains you. This may seem obvious yet it has been a breakthrough idea for some of my clients. Somehow they hadn't thought of stopping or doing less of what drained them. When they did - surprise! - they had a lot more energy.

2) Do what lights you up.

What lights you up is what energizes and enlivens you, what you love, what you're passionate about. By their very nature, your "lights" are deposits to your energy account. The more you do what lights you up, the more energy you'll have.

Like energy drains, lights are specific to each individual. What lights you up could actually drain someone else and vice versa.

People are lit up about many things: a walk on the beach, visiting an art museum, playing with a pet, listening to music, talking with friends. This list could go on forever.

The key is to identity what lights YOU up and what drains YOU. Then do more of the former and less of the latter.

An Example

I've been working on a project the last month or so, a project that was taking more time than I thought it would or "should."

I began to pressure myself to get the darn thing done. I started working more and playing less. This drained much energy out of my account without replenishing it so the balance kept getting lower and I kept feeling worse.

By the time I realized what was happening, my energy was very low. This "low balance alert" told me I needed to stop the energy drains and do more of what lights me up before I hit NSF (non-sufficient funds) in my energy account!

For me that meant allowing myself to slow down, working less on the project, and taking at least two hours every day to do something that lit me up.

The first day on my new plan, I worked only a couple of hours on my project. I then took a top-down drive in my convertible on a summery day, went to lunch at an elegant restaurant with a book I was interested in, and spent time visiting with friends. Throughout the day, I kept reminding myself it was okay to slow down and take it easy.

By the evening I was on an energy high, feeling happy, calm, and more myself. Just one day of less drain and more lights made a huge difference! I'll continue to make this a priority until my energy account is filled up.

In Your Life

If you'd like to increase the balance in your energy account, here are a few suggestions.

1) Assess your energy account. What's your balance?

If you're overflowing with positive energy, congratulations! Keep doing what you're doing as it's working for you.

If your balance is not as high as you'd like, try the steps below.

If your energy is depleted or draining rapidly as mine was, make restoring your energy your number one priority. Use the steps below to boost your energy as quickly as possible.

2) Notice what drains you.

Ask yourself "What is draining me?" and get curious about the answer.

Give yourself permission to and be creative about how to decrease your energy drains.

3) Give yourself permission to and do more of what lights you up.

If you don't yet know what lights you up -- or would like to know more -- ask yourself on a regular basis, "What lights me up?" or "Does this light me up?"

Create a list of what makes you feel alive, sparkly, passionate, energized, soothed, and nurtured. Spend some time every day doing something from that list.

The more you do what lights you up and the less you do what drains you, the higher your energy balance.

Paraphrasing Mark Twain, "What is a woman without energy? Nothing - nothing at all." Raise your energy balance and make you and your life something - something wonderful.

What to Do When Someone is Driving You Crazy?

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 00:55:39 -0700

Have you ever had the experience where someone really gets under your skin? Perhaps it is a work colleague, a person in your social set, or maybe a family member. What is the best way to deal with this unpleasant situation?

Here a four things that you may find helpful in such situations.

1. It takes two to tango and you don't have to dance if you don't want to

If you are expecting the other person to change who they are then you are probably in for more disappointment. Most people don't change and don't even want to change. Most people have their personality well and truly set by their late twenties and the older they get the less likely it is that they will change.

Remember that any successful relationship requires effort and positive intention on both sides. If you are the one doing all the work to make the relationship function happily then you are fighting a losing battle. Ask yourself if you really need to be in this relationship? If the answer is no then remove yourself from it.

2. You are in control of your emotions

You may not always be in control of the relationship but you can choose how you act and feel emotionally. Your emotions are not a product of outside forces, they are a product of your reaction to those outside forces. The good part about this is that you have within you the power to choose what that reaction will be. All it takes is a conscious decision to be in control and then a little practice to perfect the new "in control" habit.

3. The power of non-existence

If for some reason beyond your control you can't remove yourself from the environment that the annoying person is in then there is a way that you can train that person in what constitutes reasonable behavior toward you.

Research has shown that the most powerful, results producing thing you can do to another person is to totally ignore their existence when they are behaving in ways that you find objectionable and then to act pleasantly toward them when they are acting in ways that you find reasonable.

For each and every person on this planet, including you and me, the most painful experience is to be totally ignored as if you don't even exist. Just imagine what it would be like if you were in a social gathering and people not only didn't speak to you or look at you but they acted as if you weren't even there at all.

Using this technique of totally ignoring the existence of a person when they are behaving in an unwanted manner and then interacting normally when their behavior improves has been showed to change the behavior of even retarded people with severe learning difficulties. It works even more powerfully on the so-called "normal" person.

4. Accept that your responsibility is to yourself, first and foremost

When you have to deal with an unpleasant person it is important to remember that your first responsibility in this world is to your own survival, and that includes your emotional survival. If you cannot be happy and content within yourself then it is unlikely that you can help others be happy and content.

Because of your primary responsibility to yourself then you are totally within your rights to remove yourself from the company of people who threaten your emotional well being. It is also totally within your right to practice the ignoring strategy outline in point 3 above.

If you are feeling guilty in anyway for using these strategies then it is important for you to accept that taking care of your own emotional well being is not only your right it is also your number one responsibility.